Having children that age sort clothes, however, is not only a fun exercise it is challenging and can teach young children about colors, discerning differences in types of clothes, what goes where when doing laundry and why. These types of lessons, if instilled early, will stick with the child throughout their lives. They form good habits for when they will have to do their own chores in their own houses.

Just as important as giving age appropriate chores, it is important to not “dumb-down” a child’s chores just because you are afraid they might do something poorly or possibly wrong. Allowing a child to do the dishes, as an example, and handle knives, if supervised is one way of showing them how to be careful around potentially dangerous objects and also will help them understand why some chores are critical to the healthy and successful functioning of any household.

How and When to Step In

Also, do not assume that because someone is an adult that they know how to do something. We all know a male or female who never had to learn about doing the laundry until they were out on their own and responsible for the whole process themselves. Almost all of us have a story or two about a “friend” who did not know how to separate clothes and ended up with whites that were tinged a faded color of whatever article of clothing should have been washed in colored laundry.

If you wonder whether someone has the expertise to do a job, ask them. Just be sure that you do in a manner that is not accusatory or puts them on the defensive. Watch your tone of voice and ask the question in a way that shows you are merely curious and there to help them if they need help. That approach will not only surprise them, it will surprise you in how much they will rely on your expertise to get a job done and done correctly.

As an example, suppose your husband/boyfriend is doing laundry for the first time for both of you. You can lord over them, monitoring them like a hawk and jump all over them if they mix colors with whites or if they start to through your bra in the drier instead of hang drying them. This approach will garner you ill will and a defensive and reluctant helper. 

Or you could approach the situation with them together, pointing out that you “prefer” that your bras be hung dry as they do not shrink or fray that way and it would be very helpful if they could remember that whenever they do laundry. You can also point out to them before hand that mixing colors and white will dye their t-shirts an off-color, so they want to be very careful not to ever let that happen. This approach gets your point across, but does not do in a way that is bossy or accusatory.

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