Will Rewards Bring Good Behavior?

By Kristi Patrice Carter

Experts are often at a crossroads when it comes to using rewards to encourage a child’s good behavior. Some support the system, whereas others worry that it can be overused and lack effect over time.

However, providing positive reinforcement and encouragement can often be a reward in itself for children and may be all you need to keep your child on his best behavior.

So, how can you use a system of encouragement to tame your unruly tyke? Read on for some ideas that you can use for your own children.

Consider first how you yourself reward your child for good behavior. Do you buy him a toy that he has been asking for? Or do you allow your daughter one more hour of TV? There are many methods you can use that won’t cost you your hard-earned money.

Use praise. Praise builds on a child’s need to feel loved and accepted. Praising your child for an accomplishment or behavior can reinforce that love and approval. By using this method of verbal reinforcement, you can make all the difference in the world to your child because, even to young children, what you say to them is very important. It is positive reinforcement at its very best.

Allow your child to make a decision. Another way of rewarding your child is by allowing him more time doing something fun or something he wishes to do. For example, if your son did his homework without your asking or helped you with a chore that is normally not his responsibility, you could let him pick a movie rental or decide what is for dinner that night. Allowing your child to make a decision also rewards him in allowing him to feel that he makes a difference in the household.

Give your child the day off. As a reward for exceptionally good behavior, you could give your daughter the day off from a particular chore that she normally must do like feed the cat or fold the laundry.

If you are considering the reward methods previously mentioned, you should keep in mind that it can be overused to a degree that the child would do anything for that particular reward. So, you’ll need to manage some balance in the system.

But to really ensure your child’s good behavior, you must do so from the start. Raise your child to understand what is expected of him and what will not be tolerated. Then follow through with a system of praise and allowing your child a role in some minor decision making as reward. If you are consistent with your routine and your expectations, positive reinforcement will ensure your child has not only been good, but is loved and accepted for who he is. Once that is established, the rest will follow.